3 shifts to help you slow down when life is busy
Life is busy. I bet right now that you have a to-do list as long as your arm and that you’re spinning about a hundred different plates.
And then someone, like me, comes along and tells you that you should try and slow down so that you can support yourself to gently thrive. To give yourself the space to make sure you are looking after yourself properly and to go at a pace that feels sustainable and joyful to you.
But that can just feel like an impossible task!
Because how do you give yourself the time to slow down whilst also getting everything done that you need to?
Slowing down is about more than just finding the time…
Even if you didn’t have a huge mountain of things to get through, slowing down can feel really difficult. Especially if you have been going at a hundred miles per hour for so long.
If you then try to take life at a more leisurely pace, it just doesn’t feel safe for your nervous system. Instead, it brings up feelings of guilt and unease.
If this is you, then please know that you are not alone in feeling like this.
So what can you do?
As a first step, I would encourage you to think about the idea of slowing down in a different way.
Instead of seeing it as doing less and forcing yourself to take things off your list (which can feel overwhelming in itself), consider slowing down as a way of doing things with more presence and less urgency.
I’ve included some shifts below that have helped me to slow down by being more intentional with how I’m spending my time, whilst still getting everything on the list done.
Planning shifts
Schedule breaks into your day, every 90 minutes or so. And force yourself to take them, even if it’s just for 5 minutes. The break will create a little bit of spaciousness in your day, making it feel less relentless. And you’ll come back to the list with a little more perspective and enthusiasm!
I like to time box my day, and as well as putting the breaks in, I try to be accurate with how long a task will take me so I don’t end up trying to rush it. Not only will you have dedicated time to get each task done, but you will know that you are not trying to cram too much into your day that just isn’t physically possible (no more getting to the end of the day and being disappointed that you didn’t magically turn 12 hours worth of tasks into 7 hours!).
Something that always makes me feel unnecessarily busy and creates a sense of urgency is when I don’t give myself enough time to travel somewhere. So if I have a meeting and I know that I can walk there quickly in 10 minutes, I try to leave 15 minutes so that I can go at a more leisurely pace. In my experience (and maybe it’s because I live in London where everyone speedwalks!) changing your walking pace is one of the easiest ways to make you feel like you’re slowing things down in your day.
Make it a non-negotiable to have 10 minutes in your day for you to go slow. You might want to pick up your book, doodle in your journal, or just stare out of the window. But putting in 10 minutes to purposefully slow down can have a big impact on how you feel the rest of your day.
How I time box my days
An example of how I time box my day to let me be more intentional and take breaks…
Mindset shifts
We can often feel busy because we feel like everything needs to be done urgently. Social media is to blame for a lot of this as we compare our lives to other people’s! If you find yourself scrolling and then feel like you need to act fast to ‘catch up’, give yourself permission to unplug from the apps. Life isn’t a race, and you are not behind.
Allow yourself to do something in the easiest way. We often feel busy because we try to do things ‘perfectly’ or in a certain way. But if you do something the easiest way, it’s still getting done and it won’t feel like an uphill battle to get there. And once it’s done, you can tick it off the list and enjoy the extra head space and time!
Nervous system shifts
If your day ever feels overwhelmingly busy, close your eyes and take 3 deep breaths. This sends a signal to your brain that you are able to step out of flight & fight mode and you will start to feel calmer.
Another good reset when things feel really busy and like you’re jumping from one thing to the next is to take 30 seconds to look around and notice what is going on. Notice what you can see, hear, smell, and feel. It will allow you to get some perspective which will help you to continue with your day feeling more grounded.
Try to be really present for those micro-moments of joy in your day. Savour that first sip of coffee in the morning, watching your kids play nicely together, or soak up the feeling of sunshine on your face. It will only take a couple of seconds, but again it allows your brain to register those little glimmers and to give you a pause before getting back to the long list of to-dos.
Make it stand out
Savouring your morning coffee is a great way to be present for these micro-moments of joy!
Slowing down doesn’t mean neglecting all your responsibilities. It’s about finding moments of calm and stillness in your days and letting your nervous system know that it is safe to slow down; it could be taking 5 minutes before the start of your day to schedule when you will do your tasks and have your breaks, or you might want to try taking 3 deep breaths whilst the kettle is boiling for a cup of tea.
Because when you are continuously busy, you risk feeling exhausted, unfulfilled, and frustrated. But if you take the time to be more purposeful and to allow for things to feel less urgent, you will feel more steady in yourself, you start to build self-trust, and you find more joy.
So where could you build more slowness into your days this week?
And if you’d like some support with this, why not book in for a chat with me here. It would be great to explore this further with you.